White People Vs Pakistani Holidays
When going on Holiday most people would love the idea of going to a warm place where there is the sun and a pool and a fancy hotel with room service and white tiles. Oooo don’t forget that nice brown tan. So what do you do when your getting ready to go on holiday? Lets say your going to Spain. Your main priority is booking a plane. A efficient plane that has great service. What’s next? Oh yeah a nice hotel with a pool. And you would look up tourists spots and restaurants online so you have a basic plan on what to do on your perfect relaxing holiday. Brilliant so now your just packing a hand luggage as its only for a few days. Sun cream a few shirts and shorts and swim wear and shoes… so that’s it your ready to go on holiday!
Well it ain’t exactly simple for us Pakistani Families. It’s way more complicated than that. And Oh My God the word “Holiday” is some kind of backwards shit. It has a whole new different meaning. Ok so when it comes to holidays I’m pretty sure that most Pakistanis can agree on this. The only place your ever going to visit whilst living with your parents is PAKISTAN. There is no other option! There’s no “Oooo Barbados sounds nice” “Oh I heard Mykonos looks good” or “How about Cyprus?” No its Pakistan or your staying at home making roti. Ok we have Pakistan as our deluxe warm holiday destination. Brilliant! It’s warm and they might be a nice hotel. Well they might be. But we wouldn’t actually know, since we would stay with our parents families in a farm. There’s no pool there’s a bath for the cows. There’s no nice views , instead there’s acres of fricking land that we Pakistanis are proud of.
So we have the destination and the “resort” we are staying in. What about the plane? Oh its simple PIA (PAKISTANI INTERNATIONAL AIRWAYS) a one-way flight, no Asian parents like the whole faff of Emirates where they stop in Dubai. Naaah it’s PIA. (even though it looks dodgy, in our parents eyes its efficient) OK so the main bit is over right? What do you do on holiday? Well there’s either a wedding going on or you spend the whole holiday break trying to communicate with your grandparents even if you speak little Urdu or Punjabi. It took me a week to make them understand that no British people don’t eat Cats or Dogs. We go to different towns to meet our Uncles and Aunties. And that’s pretty much it. Now your all thinking? What no sun bathing… don’t you want a tan Jay Jay? NO we stay inside because that’s the last thing I want. I don’t need a tan. I’m brown already.
When it comes to packing there’s no such thing as just hand luggage. When my mum went to visit her mum for a week in Pakistan she was packing her suitcase. The next few days I realised that she’s taking 4 big Suitcases!!!! Why? Because she’s not only packing for herself she’s packing 10 million gifts for every person in our family back there. So that’s a jumper, a scarf and some shoes for Ami Jee a nice set of salwar kameez for Abba jee. 5 suits and perfume sets for my 5 aunties and some toys and kids clothes for there kids and don’t forget some suits and shoes for my Uncles. So that’s us paying for more added weight on the cases. The last suit case was full of pots and pans and ingredients like garlic and onion! Like come on mum your going for a week and your packing like your going forever. Also to add they have onions and garlic for your curry in PAKISTAN! To finish it off we tie some kind of distinct ribbon on the suitcase as we are so protective over them. Its normally our mums who rip a piece of cloth from there salwar kameez. On top of that we use white tape as a big arse label that would say ENGLAND TO ISLAMABAD. Just to be on the safe side.
So in conclusion I would say would I call going to Pakistan a holiday? No I would call it making you skint. With all the plane costs and family costs it sure isn’t worth it because when I’m there I come back with loads of mosquito bites or ding dong boxes and then getting the shits because of the food over there. On top of that I have to get injections before that. What you should do is book a holiday where you know you have no extended family members it’s less stressful and cheap. But all of us Pakistani kids with Pakistani parents know that wont happen. It’s Pakistan or nothing.